Tis’ the season to practice self-care

The whiff of pumpkin spice floats through the local coffee shop as people hustle and bustle in and out the front door. The ring of the door starts to blend into the background as the hot beverage toasts your insides. You take a slow breath deep into your lungs and exhale fully. You settle into the wooden bench, wrap your hands around the cup for extra warmth, and then grab a book. You turn to the page with the bookmark nestled and start to read, letting yourself be transported into a different world.

Sounds delightful, yes? The holiday time is upon us and while our responsibilities may double, or even triple self-care is undoubtedly an important way to keep us stable and grounded. Here are three ways to practice self-care during the season.

Set Boundaries

A boundary is defined as “a line that marks the limits of an area; a dividing line.” The way I describe it to my clients is boundaries is where “you” end and “I” begin. For some they believe a boundary is set to offend them in some way. It is not! A boundary is for you to manage the priorities and goals you have set for your life.
One of the shortest words in the dictionary is “no” however it is for some one the hardest expressions to use. For some we are people pleasers and consistently put other people needs in front of our own. Similarly, some of us feel paralyzed at the thoughts of disappointing someone or feel selfish putting our needs first.
Boundaries empower us. They help bring order to our lives. They help us to stay mindful and effective with our goals.

Some ways to set a boundary:
Say “no!”
Tell someone that a topic is off limits to you.
Leave a party early for “you” time.
Buy the boxed stuffing.
Schedule time into your calendar to rest, unwind, and reset.

Practice Gratitude

In an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting over eight years ago, a member suggested that we change the words “I have to” to “I get to.” It was exactly the pearl of wisdom I needed. And it has changed my life significantly.
Gratitude is the practice of being thankful. “Gratitude is a positive emotion that involves being thankful and appreciative and is associated with several mental and physical health benefits. When you experience gratitude, you feel grateful for something or someone in your life and respond with feelings of kindness, warmth, and other forms of generosity.”
Over time, the practice of gratitude increases happiness and fosters both physical and psychological health. Gratitude helps us to decrease negativity, bitterness, and comparison. Noticing the goodness in life, helps us to reduce negative affect and improve our mood.

Ways to practice gratitude:
At holiday celebrations identify something you are thankful for the person sitting next to you. Then they return the favor.
Pass around blank cards and have each guest write down one thing they are grateful for. Place into a large empty bowl and read aloud anonymously during coffee and cookies.
Each morning and each evening focus on something that you are grateful for.
Pick out a gratitude word, such as kindness or giving, and embody it for the day.

Practice joyful movement

As a little girl I swirled my baton in our side yard for hours…literally hours. I was completely present, full of joy, and participating in the here-and-now. My mom eventually called me in for dinner, but in those moments, I was fully attached to the now. When is the last time you felt that?

Joyful movement is moving your body for the sake of moving it in a way that is pleasurable and joyful. It is listening to your body’s cues and letting go of societal expectations, such as to move for weight loss, body change, or as a chore. It is not filled with guilt, competition, and shame. It is movement that celebrates your body. It centers around what feels good to you, not anyone else.

Some ways to practice joyful movement:
Run in a park with your pet.
Go into nature and find leaves to use for a holiday centerpiece.
Build sandcastles! Swim in the ocean!
Play hide-and-seek with your kids.
Practice gentle stretches.
Have a dance party!

Have an incredible holiday season where you put yourself first, by setting boundaries, practicing gratitude, and engaging in joyful movement.
Happy Holidays!
Warmly, Meredith